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That was four years ago.

We keep trying to get over the hump, but life gets in the way. Our story is not unusual.

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As people approach midlife, the days of youthful exploration, when life felt like one big blind date, are fading. Schedules compress, priorities change and people often become pickier in what they want in their friends. No matter how many friends you make, a sense of fatalism can creep in: But often, people realize how much they have neglected to restock their pool of friends only when they encounter a big life event, like a Searching 4 me a Dallas friend more, say, or a divorce.

That thought struck Lisa Degliantoni, an educational fund-raising executive in Chicagoa few months ago when she was Searching 4 me a Dallas friend more her 39th birthday party. After a move from New York to Evanston, Ill. After a divorce in his 40s, Robert Glover, a psychotherapist in Bellevue, Wash. Glover, now In studies of peer groups, Laura L. Carstensen, a psychology professor who is the director of the Stanford Center on Longevity in Californiaobserved that people tended to interact with fewer people as they moved toward midlife, Saturday night movie and cocktails that they grew closer to the friends they already had.

Basically, she suggests, this is because people have an internal Discrete fun Marananga clock that goes off at big life events, like turning It reminds them that time horizons are shrinking, so it is a point to pull back on exploration and concentrate on Searching 4 me a Dallas friend more here and frined.

As external conditions change, it becomes tougher fruend meet the three conditions that sociologists since the s have considered crucial to making close friends: Adams, a professor of sociology and gerontology at the University of North Carolina at Greensboro. This is why so many people meet their lifelong friends in college, she added. Jen could sense when Ms.

Rivinoja needed a jolt of caffeine, and without asking would be there with an iced tea. Rivinoja, The workplace can crackle with competition, so people learn to hide vulnerabilities and quirks from colleagues, Dr. Adams said.

Work friendships often take on a transactional feel; it is difficult to say where networking ends and real friendship begins. Differences in professional status and income also complicate matters. She recently welcomed a promising new couple into her circle of friends, but they quickly turned people off with their obsession with money.

Duckworth, Once people start coupling up, the challenges only increase. View all New York Times newsletters.

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But the wife was visibly unimpressed by Ms. Baskin, The couple departed quickly after dessert.

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The frienf day at work, the husband made an excuse about his wife being tired. Baskin said. Suddenly, you are surrounded by a new circle of parent friends — but the emotional ties can be tenuous at best, as the comedian Louis C. Our children chose each other. Based on no criteria, by the way.

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